Friday, December 27, 2013

A time to be BRAVE... not STRONG


During this time of year many emotions surface. There is a lot of reflection as the year ends and a new one begins. Many people feel hopeless, depressed, alone and discouraged thinking about the things they could have accomplished but didn't or the bad choices they made and now regret. Others missing the loved ones that didn't make it to see the new year because they passed on.  All being normal human emotions that will pass and the greatest lesson that can come from them is a CHOICE to live better, and love more.
  

I used be the one admiring people that showed themselves to be wonder-woman / super-man during crisis.  That was until it was my turn to live it and I failed miserably.  There is a reason why the bible says "cry with those who cry" and why it also says that there is a time for everything under the sun, "a time to laugh and a time to cry."   I realized that there is a big difference between trusting in the strength of God to take you through difficult times and using your own strength to show the world that you are not weak.

After my brother's death I had a revelation of what truly strong people do in times of crisis; they grieve. They possess the courage to cry, miss, anger, and feel whatever it is they need to FEEL. They are brave enough to go through the process of mourning; be it a death, a divorce, a job, whatever it was that caused pain or loss.... they allow themselves the privilege to FEEL.

No longer will I ever tell a broken soul  "be strong" or "don't cry."  It is true, they have to go on with their life; it is true that if it was a death they suffered that the other person is in a better place. But it's also true that the pain is real and so is the loneliness.  The sorrow of knowing that you will no longer be sharing life with that person on this earth, is real. Emotions cannot be shut off like a light switch, there is a process and I'm here to tell you that its not a short one.   The good news is that if you are committed to getting through the mourning process you will start living your best life in their honor and in due time you will laugh again.

Our only job during hard times is to keep God's promises in our heart... to know that this too shall pass, and that the Lord will give us the strength we need to carry on. Trust that in Him we will have the peace that surpasses all understanding.  We must do what ever it takes to allow ourselves to heal. Get help, talk to someone, don't alienate yourself, stay close to people you love and understand your pain. Everyday take baby steps forward not backward.

Lastly, when we suffer a loss.... being strong is not an option; be brave instead and face the pain. God will help you through.

Thanks for reading!

4 comments:

  1. WHAT A GREAT WAY IN LOOKING AT THINGS YOU ARE SO RIGHT IF ONLY THOSE WHO FELT SO HOPELESS AND FILLED WITH REGRET WOULD OF SEEN A WAY THROUGH AND TO BE BRAVE INSTEAD OF JUST TRYING TO BE STRONG,WISHING THEY WERE CLOSER TO PEOPLE LIKE YOU LIKE THEY SHOULD OF BEEN, FEELING SO MUCH REGRET, BUT GETTING THROUGH...AND YOU ARE SO RIGHT WITHOUT GOD I DONT THINK ANY OF US COULD GET THROUGH, THANKS FOR THE HOPE...

    ReplyDelete
  2. Millie, I am reading this on January 22,2014, thank you so much for such encouraging words. For the past 5 years I have had to be strong. Strong to endure my sons cancer diagnoses and also my husbands Alzheimer's diagnosis. Strength and peace that I could not find in myself but in Christ. Now what I need is the courage to face the future without my husband ( he went home to be with The Lord on December 31,2013), but with the promise of new life that He has given my son who is now in remission. Now is the time to be brave. Deuteronomy 31:6. God bless you and may He continue to use you to remind us of His promises.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Annette, its great hearing from you! We have been praying for you and your family throughout this difficult time. We are confident that God has you in the palm of His hand and will continue giving you the strength you need. You can count on our prayers for guidance in the days to follow.

      Delete
  3. Thank you so much Millie. In my husband's last words when asked "Is God good?"-"Always!"

    ReplyDelete