This week I want to talk about something that I’m having trouble coming to terms with. As much as I try accepting it, sometimes it just drives me insane!! There is nothing I can do to stop it; I try to ignore it, fight it, and even make peace with it. But some days it just takes its toll on me and consumes me. AGE! Along with other transitions and adjustments. LOL As we get older we realize that very few things stay the same. Our life takes many unexpected turns. Many times we are caught without the tools to cope. Hopefully we can find some tools together this week.
In my life I have experienced my share of uncomfortable transitions. Changes like going from single to married, from living in one place to moving to another, from wife to wife & mother, going from young to not so young lol although all of these are transitions,they are accepted and we adjust rapidly. It’s the unexpected transitions that challenge us and change us. Things like AGING, the death of a spouse or loved one, divorce, illness, empty nest and job loss.
When I got married the two transitions I had to adjust to immediately were going from single to married and moving from one state to another. It was easier said than done. I was 23 years old at the time and I missed my mommy!!! Lol My family is very close knit, a week doesn’t go by without us talking or seeing one another. So you can imagine the loneliness I felt living away from them. I remember there were times when I would just sit in my car and cry my eyes out. One day my hubby caught me in one of those episodes.lol He knocked on the car window and asked me what was wrong. I yelled to the top of my lungs "I don’t know where to go, I don’t know anyone, I don’t know my way around, that's what's wrong! lol It took me quite a bit of time to adjust. I decided that I would go to college and occupy my time that way. I turned my loneliness into an opportunity and I finished my BA. Lol
Transition is a passing from one form or stage to the next. With it needs to come some mourning of your previous state. I missed my friends, my family, my job, my church. All that was familiar. The problem is sometimes we stay in mourning and refuse to adjust to the new; but Ready or Not..... Change Comes :)
Amen! Millie. Imagine me at 18 years old moving to the USA the next DAY of our wedding ! No one to talk to, no Cell phone, internet skipe, nor FaceTime! I can talk about it now but back them it was sad! Oh, by the way, my English was limited to a hello and a simple smile! But I lived and learned to depend on God ! I remember reciting Palm 23 everyday ! Well, changes are coming alright ! Jovy is getting marry and it means... empty nest again! Ha, ha, We are going to have a great time and miss Jovy a little bit. LOL!! Dalmita
ReplyDeleteOmg, That must've been terrible! From state to state is bad but from another country I can't image! No wonder you are such a strong woman. Oh and empty nest.... I don't even want to think about it!!!! lol thx for sharing :) ❤
DeleteWow Millie thanks for sharing! I was 17 when I got married and felt very alone and at times still do but thank God for the great husband God has given me!
ReplyDeleteYour welcome Sonia.... It's not easy at all. Loneliness is brutal! Lol and yes, thank God for good hubbys! :)
DeleteTHAT IS SO TRUE LONELINESS IS SO HARD I FEEL IT ALL THE THING BUT IT MADE ME A STRONG PERSON
DeletePerfect time to read this blog. Its 2:43 my hubby just left with Jessie to Indiana to find our new home. I am here with mixed emotions of excitment, yet anger and fustration. I have been holding back tears because I tried to act the tough girl. But lost cause I realized my hubbys not by my side.... Thank You titi millie
ReplyDeleteyour welcome sweetie... I know that feeling all too well. Let the tears fall, they are necessary. When you are honest with yourself and allow yourself to feel you grow. The important thing is to not let those feelings hold you back from doing new things;that's what makes you strong & tough. :)
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