Pulling Out The Big Guns (2)

Back to my list… have you ever been with someone that makes you feel “not very smart”, they say things like “how can I say this in a way that you can understand it” and purposely use terms and words that are way above your head.  Well that’s what I  mean when I say be smart but not intimidating. Don’t try to impress, be yourself. I don’t mean dumb yourself down.  No way, on the contrary a secure person doesn’t have to prove a thing.  It’s the insecure one that constantly looks for ways to flaunt.

Show your strength but stay feminine ... From what I’ve seen, men like to feel like protectors, saviors, heroes. My husband travels for work quite a bit so when he is away I’m superwoman.  I pick up sofas, move the stove, carry the microwave and on and on.  But when he is home, oh no! I call for my baby, “sweetheart can you pick up this paper clip for me” hahaha JK. Show your strength but stay feminine, by this I mean don’t be a wimp but don’t pick up a car! LOL Allow them to be “the man”.  My hubby knows that I can do many things, but he appreciates that when he is home, I give him his place as a protector, savior and hero.

Be a good listener, actually show interest in what the other person has to say. I have found myself thinking of what I’m going to say next while someone is talking. That is not listening.  When the other person asks for your opinion or asks you a question, you answer, in the meantime just listen.  That’s easier said than done, I know that first hand. LOL Most men are not talkers by nature, but trust me, when you are a good listener they will talk your ear off! LOL

The next two go hand in hand, however I’m going to switch my original order; be reserved not shy….  remain a mystery.  What I mean by this is that I know of people that are self conscience even about eating in front of someone else. (That used to be me when I was younger) I wish I had this problem, now, I’m quite the opposite. I have to refrain myself from asking “are you going to eat all of that?” so that I can eat their leftovers. Hahaha JK A reserved person doesn’t say everything that’s on their mind, they think before they speak.  But when they speak, they really mean what they say.  This makes people take you seriously; you are not speaking out of emotion but out of conviction.  A shy person keeps everything to themselves, sometimes afraid that they may be wrong or judged. Most of the time when they speak, because they have held so much inside, they speak out of emotion or not at all.  Overcoming shyness sometimes requires professional help, don’t be afraid to seek it, it can change your life.

Now remain a mystery is by far one of my favorite secret weapons.  Sometimes we meet someone that we like so much that we spill out our entire life story in one breath.  Only to realize that they were not trust worthy and that now we have to live with the fact that there is a person walking the planet with the knowledge that you still suck your thumb at 55. Hahahaha that’s extreme of course, but you get my point. Don’t spill all the beans… give them out sparingly.  It not only keeps the other person interested but it’s also safer for you. 

Just want to reassure you that I have not mastered all of these, I'm learning as I go.  The good thing is that ,when you know better you do better.